One of the cruelest things is when the Bald Man holds a chicken jerky and I tilt my head up to look at it and my mouth waters with the eager and the anticipate.
And then bam I get a pain in my neck that causes me to emit the intense squeal.
And everybody’s surprised by the squeal. Honey. The Bald Man. Even me.
It hurts. It hurts a lot. And I don’t know what I did to make it so. But there is still the chicken jerky.
But I can’t look at it. I can’t raise up my head unto it.
And it is one of the cruelest things.
Now, I am taking a thing a thing called a “Stare, Oy.”
They make me pee so much. This morning I could not wait. I woke the Bald Man up at 5 am. And I said, “Listen, I’ve got to do this. Business, innit.”
And he told me to go back to bed, but I said, “Look this is gonna happen, Bald Man.”
And so we went out to the dark and the slippery ground. I lifted my leg. A good thirty seconds, innit.
And I burned a yellow hole right down into the white so deep.
And as I stood there, with my leg high and my neck low, and my relief and my strong, yellow stream, I wondered if this is what I had to look forward to. Just early peeing and stiff necks.
I hope not.
I hope I’ve got more of the crazy in me.
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